Every now and again, the British news media indulge the national talent for ironic pisstake, and I’m pleased to report that China’s touchiness in the face of global criticism in the lead-up to the Olympics is now becoming a favoured target. What makes this report (from Channel 4 News) so good is the way it kicks off in all seriousness… and turns part way into a Monty Python sketch.
The ‘rule against being earnest’ is embedded in the British character, and I’m curious to see what British athletes do. The US cyclists are being very obvious - as you’ll see in the video. Now, obvious isn’t all bad - and the cyclists have a point - but the Brits (and, I’ll wager, the Australians) will no doubt come up with something altogether more stingy. Maybe not Fatso the Fat-Arsed Panda, but I do suspect that China is at risk of experiencing something far nastier than criticism by human rights groups like Amnesty (far nastier, that is, when ‘keeping face’ is a national obsession). It’s at risk of becoming an international laughing-stock.
Channel 4 News is just the beginning of what could be an amusing fortnight.
8 Comments
It’s an irony - the more the Chinese try to be impressive (by making everything perfect) the more they fail to impress (by impinging upon their people’s human rights in the process).
Perhaps all the Chinese policemen will be ordered to smile in the future? Although I can’t imagine the smiles would be very convincing…you can’t really order someone to smile and get a genuine smile out of them in response.
On a peripherally amusing note, I was in China a few weeks ago and it was with some consternation that I discovered that this blog was one of several sites (and blogs!) that mysteriously timed out every time I tried to access them ….
Ever see Whoops Apocalypse? In it a Brezhnev like Sov Premiere is trying to impress the American Ambassador with Russian prosperity. To do this he shows him a steak.
“And don’t zink is only one we have. In Russia we haf dozens of steaks.
Humour is the dealiest weapon again dictatorial kitsch. I wonder if the PRC has much by way of stand-up?
One day years from now history students will shake their heads and wonder at the stupidity of people who thought it was agood idea to waste so much time, money and energy getting everyone to point in the same direction.
Kinda like we regard those who once sacrificed human beings to get the sun to come up.
Heh, banned in China - and until today, we’d never said a damn thing about China. Funny old world.
On second thought I know how to make all the cops in China give genuine smiles and help the cause of freedom and democracy - put ecstasy in their drinking water. And pump The Beatles thru all the speakers.
Abbey Road or Revolver is my recommedation.
So you want them armed, totalitarian AND stoned?
I like the story of teaching the chinese public how to queue and apparently more recent instructions that fat people should not wear horizontal stripes.
I haven’t been to Beijing for quite some years now, but I can tell you that if you’d been there when I worked there (or if things haven’t changed), you wouldn’t find teaching people how to queue at all amusing. The same goes for spitting and littering — there’s a reason people get fined for it, and it’s not because it isn’t necessarily a bad idea to do it.
I guess an analogy here would be for fining people for being drunk and disorderly (or all things we get fined for that are culturally specific). Lots of people from countries where people don’t drink much probably don’t quite understand that either, and think it’s funny that young males get drunk and go around having fights, harassing other people, driving their cars up and down Chapel street etc. — but it isn’t done for no reason.
I haven’t been in (mainland) China since 1987, Conrad (yes, really showing my age now). The only queue I remember was the massive one snaking around Tiananmen Square where people were waiting to visit Mao’s tomb. I remember feeling incredibly bad when local officials broke it near the entrance so we (a group of Australian high school students) could go in and visit more quickly, without having to wait.
You’re right about the spitting, though - China was the first place I’d visited where I encountered the concept of the spittoon. I once leaned over to look in one, something I have regretted ever since. Yech.